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“So You’re Going on a Mission!” Deprogramming (part 1) January 14, 2018

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Books, Responses.
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At last we are at the end of this book.  (The 1968 guide for Mormon Missionaries, if you remember)

We’ve learned how to be a perfect Mormon robot, selling the product, living with no privacy, working incredibly hard every waking hour, not even thinking about subjects that aren’t approved to think about, and don’t forget to smile!

Now she’s finally going to talk about coming back home.

Chapter 23.  The After-Mission Adjustment (more…)

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“So You’re Going on a Mission!” Fun with Beans December 30, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Books, Humor, Responses.
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We’re nearing the end of this book.  (The 1968 guide for Mormon Missionaries, if you missed it.)  I’m going to be quoting at length from some sections of this chapter, because it’s just priceless.

Chapter 22, Recreation

Chapter after chapter in this book, there’s been instructions about the correct way to work your butt off.  Preach, cook, preach, clean, preach, wash, preach, write letters, preach, keep a journal, preach, and most especially DON’T EVER THINK ABOUT SEX.

Just reading about what these guys are expected to do is exhausting.  So finally we get to a chapter about how to rest and unwind.  Oh – not so fast now! (more…)

No true Santaist December 23, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Humor, Rants, Responses.
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Over on ex-christian.net, there has recently been a commenter who seems very earnest, but less prepared than most to defend what he believes.  He assures us that he knows god personally, and that he knows because he is “filled with the holy spirit”.  But of course he is unable to demonstrate this in any way, and we’ve replied to him that we also had strong feelings back when we were religious, and that his personal feelings in no way establish the truth about his claims.   He’s been asserting that all of the ex-christians were never True Christians™ because, of course, anybody who left christianity could never have been a real christian.  He’s sure that nobody who has felt what he has felt would ever change their mind.

You can read his commentary here:

http://new.exchristian.net/2017/12/love-is-not-christian-it-is-human.html

So after trying to talk to the guy for awhile, an idea for a  cartoon about this guy popped into my head, and would not go away until I drew it.  I have very limited skills with computer graphics, so I just used powerpoint’s drawing tools to create this.  I’ll put it after the break, so there won’t be spoilers for any small children who are reading over your shoulder. (more…)

“So You’re Going on a Mission!” Driving and Goodies from Home December 21, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Books, Humor, Responses.
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Another chapter from my continuing series on the 1968 guide for Mormon Missionaries.

Chapter 20, Driving Care

OK, we’ve all seen the missionaries out on bicycles.  If you see two guys in white shirts and neckties on bikes, you can be really sure that’s who they are.  So why is there even a chapter on driving in this book?  Well, apparently there are situations where missionaries might have a car, but that’s not addressed until after she gives her safe driving lecture. (more…)

Whut??? December 15, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Humor.
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Totally irrelevant post today.  We recently ordered Chinese food, and there were still some fortune cookies hanging around the kitchen, so I cracked one open last night.  Now we always have fun with these, with how random the fortunes are, and of course the “fortune cookie game“.  But today’s fortune hit a new level of weirdness:

Here we go. Low fat, whole wheat green tea.

I just looked at it in perplexity, then said “Whut?  Then thought about it for a moment, and said “Whut?” again.

My kids both asked “Mom, what does it say!?”  So I read it to them, and simultaneously they both said “Whut?”

I don’t even know where to start with this one.  I have no idea what this is supposed to mean.  I guess green tea is low fat, but I’m sure it doesn’t come in “whole wheat”.

I googled it, and a lot of people have apparently also gotten this fortune, and are as mystified about it as I am.  Does anybody have any insights into this?

“So You’re Going on a Mission!” Money Money Money October 9, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Books, Humor, Responses.
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My continuing series about the 1968 guidebook for Mormon Missionaries.

Chapter 19, Money Care.

So after dealing with the all-important consideration of scrapbooks, she finally gets around to lesser considerations, like budgets and spending.

“The money a missionary receives from home each month has usually already been tithed so that the missionary will not need to budget for tithing.” (pg 173)

If that were talking about taxes, I’d understand.  But here she is addressing tithing as if it’s a mandatory taxation, and not a voluntary gift made to the church.  That’s a lot of control this church has over their members’ finances, do they send bill collectors if you don’t pay up? (more…)

“So You’re Going on a Mission!” Journals October 8, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Books, Humor, Responses.
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(Another installment of the continuing series on the 1968 guidebook for Missionaries I found at a used book sale.)

Chapter 18, Journal Care

“First let’s jump several years into your future.  Your mission, “the greatest experience of my life,” is now buried deep beneath diploma, job, bills, and babies.  Was it all a dream?” (pg  163)

If going on this mission was a greater life experience than having children, you’re doing it wrong, and probably should not be having children.  But on to her topic this chapter, which is about documenting every moment of this two-year recruiting project. (more…)

Amazing Graphic – All the Biases October 4, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Brain Glitches.
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My spouse put me on to this image:

This is a chart of ALL the known cognitive biases, grouped into rough categories.  This is one of my favorite subjects to learn about, because it really helps me understand why people do inexplicable things.

What are cognitive biases?  (I also like to call them “brain glitches.”)  They are the ways humans mess up when thinking, making consistent sorts of mistakes and being illogical in predictable ways.

In a way, it makes sense that we have some of these glitches. We simply do not have enough brain capacity and brain power and speed to completely think through everything in our lives.  We can sit down and ponder through a few things logically, but that’s tiring and often too slow.  Most of the time we function on “rules of thumb” and mental shortcuts, and for most of human history those worked well enough, usually.  But maybe not so well in our complicated modern world.

But some of these just seem to be idiosyncrasies of the way our brain is wired.  And we are all subject to them, to some extent.  But understanding these has certainly been helpful for me, both in catching myself thinking sloppily, or understanding why other people behave the way they do.

To see a full size image that you can actually read, please go here.

(And once I finish with sporking the Mormon guidebook, I think I might start a blog series based off this graphic, looking at sets of biases in the way they are grouped together in the chart.)

“So You’re Going on a Mission!” Don’t forget to write! September 22, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Books, Humor, Responses.
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Continuing my occasional series on the 1968 guidebook for Mormon Missionaries.

Chapter 17, Letter Care

So as I’ve mentioned before, these missionaries are thrown into a strange place, cut off from family and friends, and expected to sell religion door-to-door for many hours a week, and also expected to study, practice their presentations, go to church, and maintain perfect clothes and grooming, clean quarters, impeccable table manners, do all their own shopping, cooking, cleaning and laundry, as well as possibly needing to learn a foreign language on top of that.  And the added stress of being assigned to spend 24 hours a day with a stranger.

You’d think that would be enough to expect from these kids.  Oh no, we have to dump another expectation on top of the already impossible standards they are expected to meet.  They have to write home.  Every single week, on their one day off, the day when they are supposed to do all their shopping and laundry and any other errands, they need to add this too. (more…)

Business Turkey! August 21, 2017

Posted by Ubi Dubium in Brain Glitches, Humor.
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A story, and a look at the ways each of our brains are working differently, even when we think we are talking about the same thing.

A little while back my spouse, UbiDubiKid#1 and UbiDubiKid#2 were meeting me at my office, and then we were going to go somewhere for lunch.  I got a call on my office phone from my spouse: “Hi, we’re here. Do you want to meet us outside at the car?”  But then there was a voice in the background on the phone, one of the UbiDubiKids calling out “BUSINESS TURKEY!!!!”  And then my spouse said “Oh, wait, never mind, we’ll come in.”

Wut?

Once they came in, I got the explanation.  They had stopped at Costco on the way to my office, and had bought a 3-pack of sliced turkey.  They needed to leave it in the fridge at my office while we were at lunch, instead of leaving it in the hot car.  How to remember to do this?  UbiDubiKid#1 had suggested imagining a “business turkey” as a mnemonic, to help remember to do this.

As we were headed to lunch, over much laughter, we talked about what just happened.  As we talked, we realized that each of us had a different conception in their heads of what a “business turkey” was.  UbiDubiKid#1 had imagined a live turkey wearing a business suit.  UbiDubiKid#2 had envisioned a dead frozen turkey, wearing the suit.  I had also imagined a dead turkey, but roasted and stuffed and ready to eat, in a business suit.  And my spouse had imagined the package of sliced turkey itself  in the suit.

Now this made the whole thing even funnier, and it’s been a running joke in the family ever since.  We can say the same thing, but the thoughts going on behind it are totally different.  Brains are weird.